the last time
by DramaDelicacy
Summary: Because in one final moment of hypocrisy concealed as resolution, Chitoge runs for the last time.


Chitoge thinks the world is unfair, in a very dramatic way — because she likes to exaggerate things in a way where she (almost) victimizes herself and makes everyone else to be the villain. She sees the image in front of her and it almost feels like it's from another place, a different universe, that she doesn't belong in. _Doesn't want to belong in_. But she feels her hands shaking on her knees and she feels the cold breeze blowing at her hair not so gently, and she shivers.

Chitoge blinks, and she sighs — releasing the breath she didn't realize she was holding. Laughing bitterly, she stands (much too fast) and she feels blood rushing to her head. She holds onto the rock thoughtlessly, and she flinches when she realizes what it is she touches (for _support,_ of all things, she thinks).

Chitoge is tired, and she thinks the world is unfair. She's tired of running away, and she's tired of getting hurt by the people she consider _ed_ her friends. Chitoge is tired and she wants to just get everything over with.

So she sits on the rock, even though the feel of it disgust her, and she waits. Because if what she assume is correct, then by all the cliche in the world, the ones she waits for will come.

She sees _her_ first. The one who is always all smiles, always shy, and always the perfect girl by _his_ standards. Onodera sees Chitoge and she freezes. Chitoge smiles first, and gestures for her to come closer, so she does — hesitantly and painfully slow, but she does. She's in her fifth step when she sees Raku arrive. Chitoge laughs at this and they both look at her as if she's gone mad.

"I'm going to make this easy for the three of us, because it's gone too long and I'm tired of running," she says, standing up on the rock so they could get a better view of her. She's cold and she's tired. She wants a hot bath and sushi and she just wants to cry into her mother's shoulders.

She throws her key at Raku and he catches it flawlessly. He looks at it, and she thinks he looks hurt, but she knows it's impossible. He cares for her, she knows that much, but it's not enough. Not the way she cares for him.

"I'm not the promised girl," she says, almost too confident, and she hates herself a little. No, she hates the world. Because she thinks she's done nothing wrong to be put in a triangle so cruel it literally repeats itself. And she hates that she's hurt twice by the two people she care _d_ for the most.

"Wh—" Raku hesitates, and she sees him look as if he wants to throw the key away.

"You can do what you want with my key, at this point it doesn't matter," Chitoge sighs. "Raku…"

She hesitates and she feels like crying but this is important so Chitoge put her hands behind her back and she holds on to herself for support. Because that's all she's done in her life so far, and she knows how this goes. So she'll support herself emotionally like she always have and she'll get through this.

"I love you," she sees Onodera look at her with horror in her eyes because she beats her to the confession, and Chitoge could almost laugh at the fact that she's hurt _her_. "And it's because I love you that I'm only going to tell you this once: _do not follow me_. When I leave this place, leave me alone. This is not a friendly warning, it's your final warning.

We've had the happy coincidence of meeting again after so many years separated, and I've had fun. I've had… _a lot_ of fun. You taught me how to be friendlier, how to make friends, and how to create wonderful memories that I will never forget. I am thankful for that, and so because of that, I'm doing you a favor in return."

She looks at Onodera and smiles.

"When you love someone, don't wait until it's too long to tell them. I hope you don't waste this opportunity I'm giving you," she looks at him and smiles.

Chitoge knows it's unfair but she wants to have the last word. So she raises her hand to stop Raku from talking the moment she sees his mouth open.

"Don't come after me," she says, and she feels the tears welling up. She looks at him and she'll remember (this time she'll remember) who he is, how he looks, and how much he means to her. She supposes it isn't his best expression, but it'll do. "Claude."

He shows up almost as fast as she knows he would, with Tsugumi tailing him, looking as if she's gone through one hell of a fight.

"Ojou-sama," Claude looks at her, fixing his glasses. He looks at Onodera and Raku and she knows he understands the situation. "What would you like me to do?"

"I want to go home," Chitoge says. "To my mom."

"I can prepare the necessary transportation as soon as possible," he nods, looking back at her. "And… _them_?"

She senses the hostility in his voice and she sighs. Stepping off the rock with Tsugumi's help, she walks towards him and pats him once on the shoulder.

"Let's _go_."

She rarely uses her authority on him seriously, and she knows he understands the seriousness of her tone. He nods and he walks in front of her, pulling out his phone and dialing a number.

Chitoge feels Tsugumi's hand on her shoulder.

"What is it?" Chitoge asks, keeping her eye on Claude who is making arrangements for plane tickets to New York.

"Are you sure about this, Ojou?" Tsugumi asks, concern clearly etched in her voice.

"Do you doubt my decision?" Chitoge turns to look at her, and she feels Tsugumi pull away her hand.

"No, Ojou," she says hesitantly, putting both her arms behind her back, walking formally as if she's on a mission. "But I must inform you that you are crying and I'm simply hoping, for your sake, that they're not because of regret."

Chitoge touches her cheek and laughs silently when she feels the tears rolling down her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she wipes away her tears in one fast swoop with her hands.

"No," she smiles, looking at Tsugumi who looks like she's witnessing a murder. "They're tears of closure. Relief, I suppose. They're tears from something ending."

"Is it a happy ending?" Tsugumi asks after a few moment.

"It's an end," Chitoge says, brushing her hair aside. "Some things just end. And that's what this is."

Chitoge thinks the world is unfair, in a very dramatic way — because the world she's in is just one big dramatic play where she just can't seem to win. But she supposes, she'll have this one. In a very realistic turn of events, she's just the one not meant to be. So she thinks it's unfair, to not only her but to both Onodera and Raku. Because in one final moment of hypocrisy concealed as resolution, Chitoge runs for the last time.

She thinks it's unfair. But it doesn't matter, because it's over.

* * *

 **a/n  
** this is a mess but i just wanna get it done and over with. the newest chapter makes me so angry and bitter and sad for chitoge so i hope i at least shows her bitterness in this fic.  
goddammit, she deserves better.  
\- _dramadelicacy._


End file.
